I am making a real effort to find new friends. I have friends but few of them are moms. At least, few of my Portland friends are moms. I don't love you any less or think of you as less of a friend because you live somewhere else or work all day but let's be honest, you if you live in another state or have a job you aren't going to help me feel less isolated.
Making friends does not come naturally to me. Most of my friends have one thing in common, they are really outgoing and approached me first. This time, I have been stepping out of my comfort zone and contacting mommy/play groups through meetup.com.
You might think that publicly listed mom/play groups would be welcoming to lonely moms reaching out for friendship. You'd be wrong.
I've always felt isolated and unwelcome in groups of stay at home moms at story or music times but I always assumed it was my own neuroses that led me to feel this way. Get a group of stay-at-home moms who all already know one another and it's like a junior high clique. Apparently the same goes for those who gather on the internet.
After reaching out to a playgroup I found on meetup I got this response: "We're sorry to tell you that our group is now invite only...If you happen to know someone in the group, that person can help you get in."
Help get me in? Help get me in to what? Your group trip to playgrounds or coffee shops? I thought by the time we became parents we were past that. Or maybe not, I guess junior high kids have to learn that behavior somewhere. *sigh*
What do you think? Is it unreasonable to assume that publicly listed mom groups, or even groups of moms in coffee shops, would be welcoming to another mom looking to make more friends? Are these moms teaching their kids to have the same attitude towards friendship? Have you had any similar experiences?